Monday, June 9, 2014

I'm feeling..25?..

9 very short, exceedingly fleeting months from now, I will be 25. And I feel that ever looming quarter-life-crisis coming a bit early. 

I'm living in Rhode Island. I'm working (for the summer) in Massachusetts, and I don't have one iota of an idea what waits for me in September. I'm working at a Y summer camp, and there are positions that might open up in the fall at the Y in Connecticut, which is ideally where I want to be, but to be perfectly honest, I don't know if I want them. I've yearned, since before I even left, to get back to Connecticut, and now that the possibility is walking up to me, hand outstretched for shaking, I'm just waiting for the right moment to run the other way as fast as I can. 

My dilemma comes from the tiniest state in the land, that I now call home. I CHOSE Rhode Island. For it's region, its proximity to my favorite compound (water), my family, the food. And I've become so fond of it's traditions, people, accessibility, and just general splendor. 
I'm. Not. Ready. To. Leave.

I would be a damn fool to turn down the opportunity in the place I would eventually like to settle, simply for nostalgia's sake. But it's more than that.
There are so many things I still need to do in a very short number of years, and I can not, and will not, put myself in a position that extinguishes my 'dreams', no matter how crazy. 

I want to travel, experience different cultures, be alone, be loved, and I don't know where to start. 

All of my dreams and desires conflict and overlap and contradict the others, and in no particular order, they are:

1. Live in New York.
2. If not NYC, then Chicago or Boston or some big wonderful city, East of the Rockies. 
3. Live in the UK. Ireland, France, Scotland, Italy. (Those ARE in order.)
4. Marry a wonderful man who makes me a better person every day. 
5. Have a child
6. Open my own bakery
7. Audition for more broadway shows than I can count, and hopefully take the stage in one. 
8. Become an Astronomer.
9. Work in an office as a receptionist, and get to dress up every day. 
10. Live alone, and watch Netflix with wine and my cats. 
11. Be able to own cats and not get any grief about it. 
12. Have enough time to craft things and sell them for profit. 
13. Participate in local theatre shows and not care how good or bad I may be. 
14. Finish college (hah!)
15. Be happy. 

Obviously, some of these are more than attainable, they're likely. The dilemma comes from not having any one dream that sticks out, or any few things that I would feel comfortable putting on the back burner. I want them all equal, and at the risk of sounding like Veruca Salt and her golden eggs, I want them now. I want them before I'm too old to achieve them. Biologically, I can't put some of those on hold for too long, or else they will never happen. How does one decide what their next step will be? How do I choose between Broadway and my children? How do I say it's the stars or the bakery, but not both? It's an impossible decision, which is why I'm rapidly approaching 25, with this list of my yet-to-come accomplishments. 

I've never been a decidedly Christian person. I'm very scientifically inclined, and while I believe in universal power and energy, I don't believe the Christian God can help me now.

So how do I pick? Rosemary's baby. 
To be clear, this is not rhetorical. I would please like some advice and life coaching. And not the, "do whatever your heart tells you," because, if you read what I just wrote, it's all of those things, which is impossible. 

In the grand scheme, I like to take things one day at a time, but with half an eye on the coming months, which is how I'm able to wake up each morning not in eternal existential crises. Just little mini ones. How I've all but decided I'm not ready to leave the state in the fall. I've got people I love, whether they know it or not, here, and day to day, that's what keeps me going.

Maybe that's why they call them "crises." Quarter, or mid-life. They're not solvable. They're not decipherable, except one day at a time, and you don't know you're through it until you're through it, but in the midst, you feel utterly lost and helpless. 

• a time of intense difficulty, trouble, or danger.
• a time when a difficult or important decision must be made.

While I usually write these posts as diary entries, I'm desperately and pathetically pleading for feedback. Email, text, comment, personal message, however. Please be cruel and hard on me and don't take pity or sugar coat. I need honesty and support and disbelievers and hope. Who are you without people around you, of all kinds. Just be prepared, if you choose to discuss a non-positive route on one of my dreams, I WILL fight you and defend myself. You've been warned. 

I anxiously and fervently await responses. 

Go raibh céad míle maith agat.

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

123 Easy St.

     "It's only about, oh, every day that I wish for a simpler life. Simpler society. One with morals and ethics and a sense of decorum. Tact and tradition have been thoroughly lost these days and I can only hope that I, one day, will have the opportunity to make MY entire world simpler."

     I've just recently, as in about twenty minutes ago, posted this thought onto my facebook page, but I did not seem to be able to leave it there. I must expand and get out my thoughts. 

    Let me start with my current life happenings. After a very busy, though successful holiday season at Victoria's Secret, I was not kept on as a permanent associate. Though I do have a job at the YMCA, it has given me a lot of time to think about my life in the past few weeks. I am looking for something full time, but I've managed just well enough without one so far. Personal life, has improved about ten thousand fold. There are every day qualms and struggles to stress about, but nothing life altering. 

Except for Robert. 

Robert, has just recently come into my life, and made the darkest days sunny again. I really can not express how greatly I care for him. We have been in contact for a few months. About a month or so before Christmas, and we finally went out on Superbowl Sunday. In a short month, we've been made official as boyfriend and girlfriend and I am very happy. He is smart, handsome, talented at his passion, and actually has a passion; flying. He has taken me up, and is a wonderful pilot. He definitely impresses me with it. He is from just outside Boston, but the distance has had no real impact on us. I can not wait to see where this road and Robert take me. I am very much excited for whatever lies ahead. 

Robert's parents are from Portugal. More specifically, the Azores. (Impressive, huh?) Though he does not really look Portuguese, his family has the elegance, tradition, manner, and class of a good European family. This is part of my inspiration. 

I see the life they lead, very happy in their position, not overcome with material things, though they are not puritans in the sense, and appreciating little things like good food, and time with family. These are some of the most fundamental, core values that I love about places outside of the US. It is part of their blood and their heritage. They embrace the Americas and it's fast-paced society, but they never fail to remember what is really important. 

Now, I HAVE only met his parents once, but from what I know about them from our interactions and what Robert has told and shown me, I get this impression, and I very much like it. I've seen it before, on a much larger scale, whilst in Ireland. There are very few things more important than family, friends, life, and happiness. Not money, or power, or material things. None of that matters if you've got friends at your door, and love in your heart. THESE, are the things I long for. I couldn't care less about all of my stuff, if I have no one to spend my time and share my heart with, it's not worth it. 

Whew! Enough ranting. Move it along.

I've been watching Downton Abbey. The newly skyrocketed fad of a show has not left me behind in the list of it's victims. I have always put Pride and Prejudice as one of my top five favorite movies and Jane Eyre as my favorite book, and though this is a little later as far as time period goes, there are MANY similar themes and situations. 

I have ALWAYS admired the lifestyle of the Bennett and Rochester Households. Calm and simple and loving. There were no cell phones, or Facebook or computers to occupy people's time, money and brain cells with. Only books, family, dancing, and love. Tell me that isn't appealing?! Austen and Bronte have made me a jealous fit, and Julian Fellowes has done nothing less. Old houses, old traditions, old clothes, and customs. There are few things in life more appealing to me. 

I have had the desire to live out of country for quite some time now, but only in the past year or so, has it seemed a real possibility. What is stopping me? Nothing. Bills, and money don't deter me, for I would certainly not be living on the dole in another country, just as I am not here. I would work. Loyalty to country has very little to do with it. The state of the country, I try not to let encourage me to flee as quickly as I can, but it certainly is difficult. Family does not stop me. Surely I would miss them, but they will understand. It is MY life, after all. They all have their own, and this would be how I chose to live mine. I would hope I could be married to, or be with someone who supported me one hundred percent, and was one hundred-fifty percent by my side in the journey. 

Each day I try to think of reasons to stay, or a reason NOT to go, I suppose, and I am rewarded with nothing but support and more evidence to encourage me to go. 

So tell me. Why not? What or who is stopping me from fleeing the country and never turning back?
It's definitely better than a stick in the eye. 

My Aunt Connie says that all the time. I DO suppose there aren't many things that aren't better than a stick in the eye...

Anywhom. Goodnight peaceful bugs. :)

11 days and counting.

We're all supposed to die on the 21st right? That's when some catastrophic world event is going to end us all? Yeah, well, we all have our ideas. Some, better than others.

It is time, long overdue, frankly, for a new post. Almost 6 months since my last one. I used to think this cathartic and soothing, but I simply have not thought about it, despite the ever accessible app on my home screen. For shame. Better late than never, I always say.

First, I am quite ready for a new start. Be it the Judgement and an eternal life in happiness or fire and brimstone, or simply the new year. Though, I have never found much promise in the new year. Simply frustration with writing the date wrong for the first 2 months. I suppose I've found myself to not be one for resolutions, but rather have every day start with a resolution. I've found how things can change over the course of a single minute, never mind a whole day, and I don't think I like making life goals for myself only once a year. Anyway! Enough Scrooge talk. I am also ready for the next chapter of my life to kick in. Maybe it has, and I just can't see it, because I'm in it.

In the past 6 months, I have moved. Drastically. 800 miles across country. Granted, I am nearer to friends and more family, but I would be lying if I said I didn't miss the stability and certainty of North Carolina, no matter how much I despised the place. I have had good relationships, bad ones, short ones, shorter ones, and relationships that didn't get their fair shot in. Only to be ever lurking in the recesses of my romantic mind. Been through jobs, a new home, and most recently, a broken up car. .

Not only have I not finished this post, the world did not in fact end, which gives me the most splendid opportunity to post, as-is, and start anew.

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Absence makes the heart wander.

Whew! I've been away for so long, I have been quite busy and I have a lot to talk about!

First. Merry Christmas! Happy New Year! No more boyfriend. Happy Valentines Day! Happy Birthday! and Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Oh my, that IS a lot to cover!

Let's start with my birthday. I turned 22 this year.. Goodness gracious. I had a really good birthday though. I spent the day with my niece and my grandmother and we went to Chuck E. Cheese's. My niece is four, so it's okay. :)  That was really fun and then later, there was me and my friend's time. We went bowling, and to a bar for about 5 minutes. Overall, uneventful, but still a good day.  Let's see.. other Holidays. Oh, I spend Christmas Eve and Christmas Day in Disney! I'll never do it again... I went to Rhode Island and was with my dad for New Years. Spent Valentine's Day eating pizza and watching movies with one of my dearest friends, and St. Patrick's Day in a car driving to and from northern Virginia. Something kind of unique for each holiday, but few of them traditional. 

On to the issue of no more boyfriend. We broke up at the end of January, but we still talk almost every day. There was a situation that neither of us could help, and we just couldn't be together any more. It obviously, doesn't feel great, but I'm doing alright, we weren't together for too long to begin with.

Moving on. 

SUMMER IS COMING! From the doppler, I would be keen to say it's already here. Has been for a while!  There has been so much BEAUTIFUL weather and hand in hand comes thunder storms. I don't mind them, in fact, I grew up watching them with my father. However, 2 summers ago, I was at the camp I work at, and I was near something that got struck by lightning. That was the single scariest thing that has ever happened to me. Needless to say, I am now much more wary of thunderstorms! I still like the thunder and rain though. :) I ALSO love thunderstorm season because I work with water. Any time there is lightning-SHUT DOWN! :D I love work, but an unexpected break is always nice.

We've been painting our house gradually over the past... while, but just a couple weeks ago, we made really good headway in terms of colors and getting things painted. My grandmother is painting the living room, a nice steely-pale blue. It's beautiful. We're painting my bathroom a nice pale green, and my bedroom is a buttery yellow. I LOVE that over the burnt pumpkin orange it is now. BLEH!  We've painted a storage chest, my desk for my room, my side table, and we're halfway done with the china cabinet. There is still PLENTY left to be done. 

I'm in school this second half of the semester, but I'm only taking two classes. I'm taking english, which will get me into ECU (YAY!) and a creative activities class, which will help me get my foot in the door of the elementary education department at ECU. Oh yeah, I'm changing majors. Again. Lol. They're both fast paced, but I don't mind that so much. They'll be over sooner. :)

Back to summer. I would love to be able to go the the beaches, that are actually here in North Carolina, sometime. My best friend, Anna-Parsons who is at ECU now would go with me, and Greenville isn't too far from the beach. My Aunt and Uncle have a house on the Isle of Palms in South Carolina, but it's super expensive to rent out. Maybe someday!

I AM however, going to Disney at the end of April and I CAN not wait. I am finally going to worlds.. Cheerleading worlds that is. Since I was about ten years old, I have been cheerleading and this is the equivalent of the olympics for competitive cheerleading. Only the best are invited, and only the best of the best win. My best friend of thirteen years is competing, and being half as far from Disney as I've been for most of my life, I am going. It will be warm, and sunny, and we'll go to the beach and have a wonderful time, NOT to mention I get to see the best teams in the world, with my very own eyes. One of the best teams, usually a top five and a lot of the time the winners, is stationed right here in my town. About 5 minutes from my house. I've been there once, to watch an open gym, and I'm going to the open house this coming saturday. They probably won't show everything they have for worlds, but a good amount. I also know a girl on one of the teams. Enough of my obsession with the most girly sport ever created.

Along with Florida, I'm going to Charleston in the beginning of June. My grandmother and I are going to see Glenn Beck (don't make fun of me) and we have actually really good seats. My sister Brenna lives in Charleston, and I've only met her once before, when I was about 5 or 6. It would be really nice to see her again, if we get a chance to get together. It will also be nice to be in such a beautiful city in June!

So let's see.. 
Sounds like a good summer :)
Not to mention I get to work in a pool and water park all summer. Tan, here I come!

I'm getting a new follower today. Yay! I've started to be friendly with the brother of one of my best friends. Welcome Gabriel! (Back) To the world of reading people's complaints about their life. :D Hope you enjoy it!

I'm going to watch New Girl now. Goodnight!
<3 -R

OH! I love these. I want to make a ton of them and sell them. Great new thing for the summer!

Friday, December 23, 2011

Qualities A Boyfriend Should Have

I saw this post from my friend the other day, and I like it, for the most part. First off, there SHOULD NOT be 100 of them, nor do there need to be. If you had to cut your list of things you want in a boyfriend down to 100, you are WAY to darn picky, and you need to be realistic. I think this could be cut down to about 10-15 MUST-haves and maybe 5-10 nice-to-haves. I'm gonna try to cut it down to what I think it should be.

I'm going to leave that list, so you can judge for yourself and see what else you would put in there other than what I have chosen for me. I WILL, however, put my commentary next to each of them, and put my new and improved list down below. :)

1. …will not cheat on me. -Duh. Honesty.
2. …will recycle, donate to a cause, volunteer, and otherwise be a contributing member to society’s well-being.-Yes, but that can break down to being a good-hearted person in general.
3. …won’t put others down to make himself feel better.- Good point, but that can be also simplified to being comfortable in himself
4. …will treat everyone with respect.- Respect. On point.
5. …will have a job.- I am always a little wary of that demand. While I do agree with it, some people have the roles reversed in their household. For all intents and purposes, as a "quality," it's out.

6. …will not smoke pot.- I think this and any other substance abuse related demands can be combined into, "Will not do something that puts his life at danger everyday."
7. …will talk when the need arises versus trying to put it off until later.-Yeahhh.. I can't say I disagree, but that's specific. I think it could be put under honesty.
8. …will not watch ESPN endlessly.- Ehh. I am an avid supporter of guys need guy time. So while I don't think they need to spend every second with me, they can not have a life of ESPN. Unless it is their job. Out.
9. …will not judge me for watching bad TV.-Agree, but it isn't by any means a deal-breaker in the relationship. Make fun of me all you want, I'm just gonna turn around and laugh at your video games. :P What is a relationship without a little teasing.
10. …will not be jealous of my gay best friend.- I agree, but who does that?! It's out. 11. …will not want to spend every waking second with me.-Yeah, but there are like 3 other demands that pretty much say the same thing. Unnecessary. How about, takes the required amount of time needed to himself, but not overboard.
12. …will call and not text.- I'm also cautious of this. It would be nice sometimes, but by no means a DEMAND. Out.
13. …will be tall.- So you're not going to fall in love with someone's personality because they're short? Hmm.. can we say SHALLOW!
14. …will be emotionally mature, available, and evolved.-Bingo. But, I think you can just say mature. That covers it.
15. …will not wear a cell phone holster. -AMEN. But again, not a deal-breaker.
16. …will know how to manage his money- Yes, but change that to responsible, and it covers a lot more and is less intimidating.
17. …will not be vain.- Humble, yeah, but if he's already good-hearted, he is almost automatically humble.
18. …will ask me how I’m doing and how my day was and actually care.- Conscientious. Yep.
19. …will be content sometimes to spend the whole day in bed watching movies and eating takeout.- That's just being loving and adventurous.
20. …will compliment me every now and then, especially when I’ve made an effort to look nice for a night out.-Conscientious and good-hearted. Who doesn't love to be complimented. :)
21. …will not be an alcoholic.-Again, danger.
22. …will have goals, dreams, and the drive to achieve them.- Driven, hard working.
23. …will understand that ‘No’ means ‘No.'-This hits SO many points. Respectful, conscientious, good-hearted. It's in, but indirectly.
24. …will know how to do his own laundry.- Responsible.
25. …will text or call just to say ‘Hi.’- Conscientious.
26. …will not live across the country.-Could that even be considered a relationship?? Out.
27. …will consider a long distance relationship if he has to move away.- Ehhh.. If you're already in a good relationship, it should just work out. If not, Then it's for the best. Doesn't this contradict the previous demand anyway.
28. …will be interested in culture, music, art, and travel.-Sure, but this goes under mature. Because most mature men, care about things that either you care about, or have a good sense of what good art, music etc. is.
29. …will have read a book since high school.- Yes, but this could go under mature in a round-about way. If he is mature enough, he will know that life isn't all about sitting in front of video games and such. He will want to educate himself more and broaden his mind.
30. …will not snore…much.-Worst demand ever. Out.
31. …will tell the truth. Honesty.
32. …will be open-minded and non-judgmental of others.-Goes with good-hearted.
33. …will put as much effort forth to find out about my day as I did about his.-Conscientious.
34. …will learn how to communicate like an adult.-Mature.
35. …will actually enjoying spending time with me.- This I think, opens maybe a new sub-category, but it goes with loving me for me.
36. …will be crazy about me as much as I will be about him.-Same as above.
37. …will not make me feel dumb or childish.-Mature and respectful. This IS a borderline deal-breaker, but it doesn't need to be so specific.
38. …will appreciate the art of foreplay.- Lol. Yes. That is important. But I think this can go into being passionate, in and out of private.
39. …will not try to teach me when I didn’t ask to be taught.-This is a strange demand. Perhaps, because I always enjoy being taught new things by my boyfriend. I want to learn anything he has to teach me, but if you do feel as such, it would go under being respectful.
40. …will wear plaid well.- Yes. Ma'am. Has a sense of style, and dresses appropriately.
41. …will want to go to sleep at night with me, and wake up beside me in the mornings, not on the couch.-This is so random and specific.. Out.
42. …will have sex with his eyes open, most of the time.-........? Out.
43. …will appreciate my efforts to try new things.- New avenue! Be adventurous! Yes. I FULLY agree with being with someone who is open to learn and try new things, maybe just because you want to try them, so he'll do it with you.
44. …will talk to me when something bothers him.-Honesty at it's best.
45. …will love me for me — faults, imperfections and all — and love me all the more for them.-This is going with being mature, but I think I would like to put it in it's own requirement. It says a lot and covers a lot of other things on this list.
46. …will continually surprise me.-This doesn't need to be with gifts or presents or whatever, but with doing something new, or even something about their actions. I LOVE being pleasantly surprised with something they say or do. I love learning new things about my boyfriend.
47. …will lovingly accept my neurosis.-Accept me for me.
48. …will have the ‘we’ team mentality.-This is being respectful and honest with each other, but I think it does raise a good point of having a mutual respect and give and take, if you will, in the relationship.
49. …will stay with me through joy and pain.-Conscientiousness and respect. And loving me for me.
50. …will have a backbone in the relationship and not be afraid to tell me ‘no.’- I like the meaning behind it, but not the wording. I think a good sense to stand up for what they believe in. Also not to let one person get too out of control. Keep each other in line
51. …will be a great kisser.-Duh. But that can be taught ;)
52. …will have a great sense of humor, but know when to be serious.- Spot on.
53. …will be more passionate in random moments.- Got it.
54. …will know who he is as a person and be honest about that.- Check.
55. …will think I’m HOT, not just cute.- Eh.. I want to be considered beautiful not matter what I look like. Even if he doesn't think I'm 'hot.' Out.
56. …will treat me as well as my friends do.- Unless you have crappy friends. Just treat me with love and respect.
57. …will be able to laugh at himself.- Check.
58. …will have a regular sized temper than does not super-size itself randomly.- This, believe it or not, falls under being passionate. If there is something he believes in so fervently that he is going to get mad over it, it is a good thing. ESPECIALLY if it's you.
59. …will kiss me passionately every once and a while.- I love that. My thing is to treat ever kiss as if it were the first and the last. :)
60. …will give me space.- Covered
61. …will not have a fixation with his ex.-Yes, but thats obvious. Mature
62. …will not make me feel like I’m only second best.- I don't think anyone should do that, but it goes with being respectful
63. …will be able to think more than two days in the future.- This is kind of obvious, but it goes along with being hard working and driven and having goals for themselves.
64. …will not go to bed at 9:30 pm.-Strange... I mean, if he needs to go to bed early to get up early I would rather him do that than go to bed late and suffer the next day. That's being responsible. Out.
65. …will have a good spiritual connection, but not enough to make me think he may want to be a priest.- This is maturity. If he knows himself well enough to have made a decision of whether or not to have a faith or religion than he's probably pretty mature.
66. …will want a family.-I PERSONALLY agree, but if YOU don't want a family, it would be counter-productive if your boyfriend does. Out.
67. …will know what a commitment is and follow up that knowledge with actions that support it.-This sentence doesn't even make any sense. But I will agree with the word commitment.
68. …will understand that relationships aren’t all perfect, and that sometimes fighting can resolve difficult issues.- I take from this, being willing to work for the relationship, because it won't come easily.
69. …will like going out on a week night sometimes, rather than just watching TV.- Not being uptight and stuffy, got it. Even though it contradicts number 19.
70. …will be responsible with money..-This was number 16 too...... -__-
71. …will get more satisfaction than dissatisfaction from his job.- I like the idea of this. Doing something that you love everyday, rather than something you hate. But you can not always be picky when it comes to jobs. Sometimes, you just need a job. You may hate it every day, but the fact that you go to it, because you know you need money for bills, is being VERY mature and responsible and I really respect that.
72. …will appreciate that my child is my number one priority.-Unless you don't have a child..
73. …will be able to deal with my pet.- Or a pet..
74. …will talk dirty.- ;) This goes along with being passionate and being adventurous.
75. …will be confident in himself, but not egotistical.-Got it.
76. …won’t have an extensive and publicly known porn collection.-LOL. This is so obvious. And HILARIOUS.
77. …will trust me.-Yes.
78. …will be more interested in sex because he wants to be with me, not because it’s sex and he just wants it.- kind of loving me for me, kind of being passionate... I don't know.. strange
79. …will love wine.-I don't give a crumb if he doesn't like wine. He can drink whatever he wants. Out.
80. …will take out the trash and happily do the dishes.- This is being mature, and we certainly appreciate it. But I don't think it's necessary.
81. …will not take himself so seriously.-Covered
82. …will not beat a dead horse of a conversation when we disagree, and try to strong arm to prove he is right- What does this even mean?! There is way too much in that sentence. Out simply on the fact it doesn't make any sense.
83. …will not be selfish with his love when things don’t go his way.-This is not being childish. If my boyfriend acted like that, I would go home. LOL
84. …will say he’s open minded and actually mean it- Yep
85. …won’t judge me by my past relationships.- I whole heartedly believe that past relationships should be discussed, because you learn more about each other that way.
86. …will not remind me of how hot girls are that are the complete opposite of me.-This is being respectful and loving me for me.
87. …will not push anal sex on me every time I’m on my period.-...........................Um. This makes me pretty uncomfortable. Out.
88. …will have sex with me while I’m on my period.-Again..... Um. Out.
89. …will have already installed the filter that lets him know when not to say inappropriate, offensive things in front of me.-Coming from a person that gets offended by almost nothing.. Out.
90. …will love that I have such a big heart.-That's a little conceited, but I suppose if he loves you, he loves your big heart..
91. …will be smart but not snide.- Yes, and confident, but not arrogant.
92. …will not have friends of the opposite sex who aren’t just friends.- That is pretty much a given too.. Infidelity will not be tolerated.
93. …will love that I’m independent.-Unless you're not. Out.
94. …will be okay with little displays of affection such as holding hands.- Yes, that is important. But that goes with wanting to spend time together, and all that jazz.
95. …will not be in trouble with the law.-Yes, but if he is responsible, mature, and knows how to handle himself, he won't be.. That is kind of essential in any relationship.
96. …will like to go down on me.-.....................Out.
97. …will not spend engagement-ring money on a Skeeball lane for his basement.-....??????? Again. Weird and too specific. Out. 

98. …will VOTE and not make excuses about why he chooses not to vote.-That is being a respectable member of society
99. …will NOT be a manorexic gym fanatic.-I like to go to the gym, but right, not manorexic. I like some meat on my man ;)
100. …will stand up for me if someone unexpectedly attacks me, verbally or otherwise, and ask questions later.- Yep. I want to be spoken for if necessary, but I can fight a battle or two for myself.

Okay. So here is the new list. I have broken it down into about 15 things, that are pretty essential in I would hope any guy and especially a boyfriend. I might be a little biased, and have based this a little bit around my boyfriend :) There are also a few things that are pretty essential to the relationship as a whole, and not just specific qualities from one person. The list is in order (pretty much) from what I think is most important, to what (out of the list) is less important. 

1. Honest
2. Mature
3. Respectful
4. Passionate

5. Doesn't take himself to seriously/sense of humor
6. Trusting
7.  Responsible
8. Good-hearted
9. Conscientious
10. Down to Earth
11. Loves me for who I am

12. Be adventurous
13. Driven and hard-working
14. Has a sense of style and dresses appropriately.

15. Believes in something and stands up for it.

16. Is comfortable and confident in himself. 

Things that are essential for a healthy functioning relationship:

Mutual respect and commitment in the relationship

Keep each other in line. 
Try to learn something new about each other every day.
Have a healthy respect for the needs of each other. Know each other's boundaries.

I think both of those are good lists. As you can see, I got that list of 100 down to about 20, in all. Again, those are for me specifically and you can feel free to think differently. I am lucky that my boyfriend possesses these qualities and I don't have to worry! :D Tell me if you like the list!!

<3 -R